Universe I beseech you

What is the purpose of it all? What is the meaning of life? What is this fruitless search and quest for happiness when it is so evanescent and false? Who are we fooling? Is there anything called a "happy life"? What am I teaching my kids? What am I raising them for? For entering this pathetic cycle of unhappiness? How will they get out of it if I can't? How will they manage this pain if I can't?

Oh someone elevate me from this abyss...oh someone pull me out. UNIVERSE....I beseech you....I beseech you....don't desert me like this....elevate me....elevate me!

I feel stripped....stripped of all cover....my raw nerves on the edge of the universe....exposed and fragile and hurting. Give me some cover. Give me some protection....give me some hope. UNIVERSE I beseech you....I beseech you. 

The Real World!

Aloka's question to me at the vet's: "Mom, is Anakin's doctor a dog or a human being?" 

The Unforgettable Galee!

It was one of those great evenings when mom, Atta and I were having our dinner together. We eat together at the table only when mom is visiting. Mom and I were ribbing Atta about a girl he had befriended while taking Anakin out on his evenings walks. The two would meet and talk under the pretext of walking their dogs.

Mom was warning Atta about him getting distracted by all this girl nonsense when his A-levels were so close. So typically mom! With food in her mouth, mom tried to say "Mein usko phone karke bolungi ke aaj kutta leke na aye" (I will call her up and ask her not to bring her dog for a walk tonight). But the food in her mouth made it sound as if she had said "Mein usko phone karke bolungi ke aaj-chutta le ke na aye".

I froze. I couldn't believe my ears- what she had just said sounded like a distorted version of a filthy Hindi word referring to the female anatomy! That's not the kind of language I expect from mom, but then she is most unpredictable. I gave her a glare and soon realized that she was not even aware of what she had said. It just sounded like it did because she was chewing her food as she said it. So, I decided to ignore it and went on eating my dinner. Just then, after a gap of about 20 seconds, Atta asks "What is chutta"? I burst out laughing.

Mom was horrified that anyone could think she would use such language. She insisted that she had not said it, but both Atta and I had heard it so there was no escaping. We probably laughed about it for the next 10-15 minutes, much to mom's chagrin.

But that was not all. For the rest of mom's stay, Atta would make it a point to remind her daily of what she had said and mom never stopped getting flustered about it. When she left, I am sure she was happy to see the end of this story finally.

Today, I saw an FB comment from grandson to grandma reminding her of the incident. Poor mom, there is not going to be any end to this unforgettable story about the unforgettable galee! 

Clear Requirements!

The other day, Aloka says to me "Mom I want to eat junk". Thinking perhaps that she meant she wanted a snack, I asked her if she would like to eat an orange. Her response- "No. Oranges are healthy. I want to eat junk"!

I really do underestimate this little peanut. 

Monsoon

Everything is growing
Wild and green
Grass, trees, weeds...
Everywhere I look
A sort of madness
Rejoicing in green!

Everywhere, everything, everyplace
...but my heart.

(I wrote this long back in India, but it rang so true today that I had to type it here. While there is no real monsoon season in Singapore, it is raining today and almost every afternoon. Everything is really green. And the heart is really not.)