Saturday, November 17, 2012

Becoming Better People

Went to see Argo with Atreya earlier this week, but we almost didn't go- because Atreya had this major guilt  trip about leaving Aloka at home! I had to shake him out of it and tell him to focus on me for a change. Ever since he has gone to NS, I have no movie companion and have missed out on many good movies. I suggested an alternative: instead of staying home all evening doing separate things, the entire family did art and craft together and then the two of us left to see the movie around her bed time. She didn't complain- she is more practical and reasonable than this boy.

Photo: Mommy mommy put one dollar for my ride please!!! (What this boy won't do for a $5 bet!)The movie was great- very funny when funny, very tense when tense, with exceptional acting and direction. But what I enjoyed most was Atreya's laughter. He laughed more than usual, even when it wasn't called for! Like he wouldn't stop laughing when the guy sitting in front of us rushed out after squirming in his seat for a long time- obviously he had to go the loo, but what's so funny about that? At one point, I didn't catch what Ben Affleck had said and finding Atreya laughing asked him what the joke was, and his response was "no clue"! As we were getting out of the mall, I dared him to sit on the kid's ride (for a $5 incentive) and he did it without much coaxing!

In the last 3-4 months, there is a sea change in Atreya. He has loosened up a lot, not as wound up as he used to be. He appears confident and in control. And super calm, as if nothing will shake him. But that doesn't mean he has become passive. After all, he convinced me to walk all the way back from Ang Mo Kio hub to home- a good 3 km at midnight!

On the way, we talked and talked and talked- he about his army experiences (both good and bad, and what good he sees in bad), and I about the current difficulties regarding my future plans. Talking to Atreya is never without its rewards, never without a certain sense of fulfillment. We usually agree on issues, but when we don't, he helps me think of things differently, always more positively. And I can almost always relate some or the other experience in my life with what he is experiencing- bringing context to new thoughts and concepts he is forming.

Because we hold up a mirror for each other, it is so important that we become better people every day, for ourselves, but mostly for each other.

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